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Banner Pilot

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• Upcoming 2024 concerts: none

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• Twin Cities (17)
• Chicago (13)
• New York (NYC) (7)
• Jacksonville (4)

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• Dead to Me (10)
• The Flatliners (10)
• Dear Landlord (7)
• The Menzingers (7)

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• Featured Interview

Interview: Banner Pilot Keep It Real And Give Us A Souvenir

• May 8, 2014
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Interview with vocalist and guitarist Nick Johnson and bassist Nate Gangelhoff  |  By Tom Haugen

My interest in all things Banner Pilot probably started before yours. In 1991, the suburbs of Minneapolis weren’t exactly a hotbed of punk rock activity. At my high school, you might spot an occasional Crass patch or someone passing around a Babes in Toyland cassette at best. Banner Pilot frontman Nick Johnson roamed the same hallways that I did – he had a Bad Religion shirt and rode a skateboard. I had a 7 Seconds shirt and rode a BMX bike. We got along just fine. About 15 years after graduation, Nick tells me his band has a new album on Fat Wreck Chords and sends me a copy. I put it in on a long drive to Alabama and don’t stop listening until I reach Mobile. Then I listen to it on the drive back. In fact, I haven’t stopped listening since, and I can only assume I’m one of many considering how popular Banner Pilot have become in a short amount of time. Here’s what Nick and bassist Nate Gangelhoff have to say about the band and their new album Souvenir.

Interview with vocalist/guitarist Nick Johnson:

I heard from you in the early 2000s and you were playing around town in a cover band. Next time I heard from you, you were crisscrossing the country on tour and putting an album out on Fat Wreck Chords. Did Banner Pilot happen as fast as it seemed?

Yeah, after Rivethead [broke up], I hooked up with the Hawaii Show, a performance art type project my friend Steve was doing. We’d write original songs and then lip sync them live with inflatable guitars and headset mics. We even wrestled in mashed potatoes once, it was awesome. I was itching to start playing punk rock again though, and I remember hanging out with Nate one summer night in ‘04, listening to The Soviettes, thinking, “We should start a band!” He already had a bunch of song ideas and we started writing. Between 2006 and 2008, we ditched the drum machine and got a band together, did a few small tours and released an EP, a 7” and then an LP. We got really lucky in ‘09 when Fat wanted to release Collapser .  It’s been a fun ride for sure.

Do you get a lot of raised eyebrows from your family about Banner Pilot? Does being on the cusp of 40 and playing punk rock go over well at the holiday dinner table?

My niece and nephews think I’m pretty cool!  But no, it’s not a big deal to my family.  They think of it like a hobby and are always interested in hearing about where I might be traveling to next with the band. If I was trying to make a living off punk rock, the conversation would probably be a little different.

Does impending fatherhood mean less time on the road with BP?

I don’t think so, but it probably will mean fewer long stretches on the road – gotta be home for tummy time and to get milk thrown up on me!

There are several Minneapolis references in your songs and you guys have an unwavering loyalty to the Twin Cities. Most people think of Minnesota as a miserable place to live. What keeps you here?

I ask myself that same question every year around this time! This winter has been particularly brutal with over 50 days below zero, ouch. Aside from inertia, I’d say friends/family, the vibrant music/art scene, and awesome summers – tons of lakes and parks. It’s a natural backdrop to a lot of the songs since I’ve lived here almost my whole life.

What do you guys do other than the band – job, career-wise? Is it feasible to make a living playing music these days?

I work in a hospital. The other guys do things involving mortgages, investments, and running movie theaters. Making a living with music really isn’t feasible at our level, but the band does basically pay for itself for which I’m really thankful. We’re just doing this for fun.

Are you still holding down lyrical duties on the new album? If so, what kinds of themes are explored?

I am! Some of the songs explore themes like loss, regret, isolation, and being stuck. Others are more about redemption, hope and optimism.

Is the lack of profanity in your songs a conscious decision?

I’m definitely conscious of it when I’m writing. I’ll allow myself a curse here or there, but too many lessens the impact and feels lazy to me. I’ll try to come up with another way to convey the intensity/emotion. That said, what we lack in profanity, we more than make up for in alcohol and weather references.

I heard a rumor – or maybe I started one – that Banner Pilot are playing our 20 year high school reunion this year. You in?

Assuming we don’t have a wedding or bar mitzvah booked that weekend, totally!

Interview with bassist Nate Gangelhoff:

How do you approach writing the music for a Banner Pilot song? Do you write 100% of the music?

I probably write 99% of the music, but I split the melodies – which are more important, in my opinion – about 50/50 with Nick. I guess the main approach is to throw a bunch of stuff against the wall and see what sticks. If you try 20 ideas, you have a reasonably good chance of getting something good out of it. The key is to not get hung up on or attached to the other 19 things that don’t work. I think if we looked at it like, “OK, now we have 12 ideas, that’s our album,” we would be releasing a pretty horrendous record right now. Basically, be willing to scrap stuff, be patient, and don’t get hung up if you realize something you may have spent a lot of time on turns out to, in fact, totally suck. The other thing that I think is a good idea is to try to picture how a random fan would react if they heard a song come up on shuffle, or a radio station, or whatever. If you can really, truly picture them getting excited, singing along, etc., then you’re on to something. It doesn’t mean you’re “right,” but it’s a good sign. On the other hand, if you, the person writing the song, can’t even picture that, get rid of the song.

You described Heart Beats Pacific as “ Collapser on steroids.” How would you describe Souvenir compared to Heart Beats Pacific ?

I guess it’s basically like we’re continuing to up our steroid-intake, and we’re having positive results. So far, so good, keep the program going, ripped and ready to go, etc. Beyond that, I think we dialed back some of the “slickness” for lack of a better word. We may have gone a little too far in that direction last time. Hopefully, it’ll sound a little different than our previous albums, but still be immediately recognizable as a Banner Pilot album. That was the goal, at least. Landing in the sweet spot between, “OK… I guess they’re playing the same song AGAIN,” and, “What are these idiots trying to do?”

Is it rad sharing the stage with bands that influenced you as a kid?

Yeah, it’s been very, very cool to share the stage with bands we all grew up listening to.

Is being a touring punk rock musician with a sizable amount of record sales as glamorous as all the kids think?

Do kids nowadays actually think being in a punk band is glamorous? That’s weird, if so! It’s super, super fun, but certainly not glamorous. I guess sometimes if we have a really good show, we will buy more extravagant burritos the next day than we would otherwise.

If Billy Morrisette from Dillinger Four hadn’t put you guys in touch with Fat Wreck Chords, where do you think Banner Pilot would be today?

That’s a really good question. I like to think we’d still be plugging away – in all honesty, this sounds hokey, but I think writing and recording music is just as fun even when barely anyone hears it. But realistically speaking, all the new fans we got through working with Fat really got us extra excited and probably sparked us to be a bit more motivated. If that hadn’t happened, it’s certainly possible we would have sorta petered out by now.

How many side projects are you in currently, and is Banner Pilot your main focus?

Pretty much just The Gateway District, and very rarely, I’ll do a recording with Off With Their Heads. I’m starting a side band – or “project” or whatever you’d call it – with some friends that’s shaping up to be pretty fun, but we haven’t done much yet. But Banner Pilot will always be the main focus.

Get your  Souvenir  here:  www.fatwreck.com/record/detail/925

bannerpilot.net

Banner Pilot Tour Dates: 5/03 Minneapolis, MN Triple Rock Social Club 5/08 Des Moines, IA Gas Lamp 5/09 Chicago, IL Beat Kitchen 5/10 Normal, IL Firehouse Pizza and Pub 5/22 Allston, MA Great Scott 5/23 Asbury Park, NJ Asbury Lanes 5/24 Brooklyn, NY Knitting Factory 5/25 Philadelphia, PA The Barbary 5/26 Baltimore, MD The Metro Gallery

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Banner pilot concert setlists & tour dates, banner pilot at the fest 2018.

• Skeleton Key
• Starting at an Ending
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Banner Pilot at Metro, Chicago, IL, USA

Banner pilot at the fest 2017.

• Spanish Reds
• Farewell to Iron Bastards
• Modern Shakes
• Intervention
• Division St.
• Central Standard

Banner Pilot at Big Pre-Fest in Little Ybor 2017

Banner pilot at the fest 2015.

• Drains to the Mississippi
• Northern Skyline

Banner Pilot at Groezrock 2015

Banner pilot at uncle m fest 2015, banner pilot at k4, nuremberg, germany, banner pilot at big pre-fest in little ybor 2014, banner pilot at metro gallery, baltimore, md, usa.

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• Skeleton Key ( 9 )
• Alchemy ( 8 )
• Division St. ( 8 )
• Effigy ( 8 )
• Spanish Reds ( 8 )

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Trains Moscow to Elektrostal: Times, Prices and Tickets

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Moscow to Elektrostal by train

The journey from Moscow to Elektrostal by train is 32.44 mi and takes 2 hr 7 min. There are 71 connections per day, with the first departure at 12:15 AM and the last at 11:46 PM. It is possible to travel from Moscow to Elektrostal by train for as little as or as much as . The best price for this journey is .

Get from Moscow to Elektrostal with Virail

Virail's search tool will provide you with the options you need when you want to go from Moscow to Elektrostal. All you need to do is enter the dates of your planned journey, and let us take care of everything else. Our engine does the hard work, searching through thousands of routes offered by our trusted travel partners to show you options for traveling by train, bus, plane, or carpool. You can filter the results to suit your needs. There are a number of filtering options, including price, one-way or round trip, departure or arrival time, duration of journey, or number of connections. Soon you'll find the best choice for your journey. When you're ready, Virail will transfer you to the provider's website to complete the booking. No matter where you're going, get there with Virail.

How can I find the cheapest train tickets to get from Moscow to Elektrostal?

Prices will vary when you travel from Moscow to Elektrostal. On average, though, you'll pay about for a train ticket. You can find train tickets for prices as low as , but it may require some flexibility with your travel plans. If you're looking for a low price, you may need to prepare to spend more time in transit. You can also often find cheaper train tickets at particular times of day, or on certain days of the week. Of course, ticket prices often change during the year, too; expect to pay more in peak season. For the lowest prices, it's usually best to make your reservation in advance. Be careful, though, as many providers do not offer refunds or exchanges on their cheapest train tickets. Unfortunately, no price was found for your trip from Moscow to Elektrostal. Selecting a new departure or arrival city, without dramatically changing your itinerary could help you find price results. Prices will vary when you travel from Moscow to Elektrostal. On average, though, you'll pay about for a train ticket. If you're looking for a low price, you may need to prepare to spend more time in transit. You can also often find cheaper train tickets at particular times of day, or on certain days of the week. Of course, ticket prices often change during the year, too; expect to pay more in peak season. For the lowest prices, it's usually best to make your reservation in advance. Be careful, though, as many providers do not offer refunds or exchanges on their cheapest train tickets.

How long does it take to get from Moscow to Elektrostal by train?

The journey between Moscow and Elektrostal by train is approximately 32.44 mi. It will take you more or less 2 hr 7 min to complete this journey. This average figure does not take into account any delays that might arise on your route in exceptional circumstances. If you are planning to make a connection or operating on a tight schedule, give yourself plenty of time. The distance between Moscow and Elektrostal is around 32.44 mi. Depending on the exact route and provider you travel with, your journey time can vary. On average, this journey will take approximately 2 hr 7 min. However, the fastest routes between Moscow and Elektrostal take 1 hr 3 min. If a fast journey is a priority for you when traveling, look out for express services that may get you there faster. Some flexibility may be necessary when booking. Often, these services only leave at particular times of day - or even on certain days of the week. You may also find a faster journey by taking an indirect route and connecting in another station along the way.

How many journeys from Moscow to Elektrostal are there every day?

On average, there are 71 daily departures from Moscow to Elektrostal. However, there may be more or less on different days. Providers' timetables can change on certain days of the week or public holidays, and many also vary at particular times of year. Some providers change their schedules during the summer season, for example. At very busy times, there may be up to departures each day. The providers that travel along this route include , and each operates according to their own specific schedules. As a traveler, you may prefer a direct journey, or you may not mind making changes and connections. If you have heavy suitcases, a direct journey could be best; otherwise, you might be able to save money and enjoy more flexibility by making a change along the way. Every day, there are an average of 18 departures from Moscow which travel directly to Elektrostal. There are 53 journeys with one change or more. Unfortunately, no connection was found for your trip from Moscow to Elektrostal. Selecting a new departure or arrival city, without dramatically changing your itinerary could help you find connections.

Book in advance and save

If you're looking for the best deal for your trip from Moscow to Elektrostal, booking train tickets in advance is a great way to save money, but keep in mind that advance tickets are usually not available until 3 months before your travel date.

Stay flexible with your travel time and explore off-peak journeys

Planning your trips around off-peak travel times not only means that you'll be able to avoid the crowds, but can also end up saving you money. Being flexible with your schedule and considering alternative routes or times will significantly impact the amount of money you spend on getting from Moscow to Elektrostal.

Always check special offers

Checking on the latest deals can help save a lot of money, making it worth taking the time to browse and compare prices. So make sure you get the best deal on your ticket and take advantage of special fares for children, youth and seniors as well as discounts for groups.

Unlock the potential of slower trains or connecting trains

If you're planning a trip with some flexible time, why not opt for the scenic route? Taking slower trains or connecting trains that make more stops may save you money on your ticket – definitely worth considering if it fits in your schedule.

Best time to book cheap train tickets from Moscow to Elektrostal

The cheapest Moscow - Elektrostal train tickets can be found for as low as $35.01 if you’re lucky, or $54.00 on average. The most expensive ticket can cost as much as $77.49.

Find the best day to travel to Elektrostal by train

When travelling to Elektrostal by train, if you want to avoid crowds you can check how frequently our customers are travelling in the next 30-days using the graph below. On average, the peak hours to travel are between 6:30am and 9am in the morning, or between 4pm and 7pm in the evening. Please keep this in mind when travelling to your point of departure as you may need some extra time to arrive, particularly in big cities!

Moscow to Elektrostal CO2 Emissions by Train

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FAA Requires Aviation Organizations to Detect, Address Safety Risks Early

WASHINGTON — The Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) is issuing new requirements for charter airlines, commuter airlines, air tour operators, and certain aircraft manufacturers to implement a Safety Management System (SMS). 

SMS provides a means for a structured, repeatable, systematic approach to proactively identify hazards and manage safety risk. By incorporating SMS, these aviation organizations will be better able to develop and implement mitigations that are appropriate to their specific environment and operations.   

The FAA’s final rule mandates that these organizations develop a SMS within one to three years, depending on the operation. The FAA has required U.S. airlines to have SMS since 2018, and some manufacturers already developed and implemented SMS, which the FAA accepted. 

“Requiring more aviation organizations to implement a proactive approach to managing safety will prevent accidents and save lives,” FAA Administrator Mike Whitaker said.  

The rule also requires those who have an SMS to share hazard information with other aviation organizations so they can work collaboratively to identify and address potential safety issues. 

The final rule goes beyond the requirements of the Aircraft Certification, Safety and Accountability Act of 2020 , which directed the FAA to mandate SMS only for aircraft manufacturers. The rule also addresses recommendations from the National Transportation Safety Board and independent review panels.  

Read the final rule .

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David pecker takes the stand in trump trial as prosecutor outlines national enquirer “catch and kill” hush money scheme — update, ‘two idiot girls’ podcast host drew afualo sets dates for ‘the loud tour’ to continue “terrorizing awful men”.

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Drew Afualo and her Two Idiot Girls podcast co-host, Deison Afualo, are embarking on a summer comedy tour. The Loud Tour will travel across the U.S. and make stops in 21 cities, supporting her first book, Loud: Accept Nothing Less Than the Life You Deserve .

“We are coming to 21 cities, across the country (bc I heard how mad u were we didn’t last time ALRIGHT!!!! JEEZ!!! lmaooooo) & i genuinely cannot wait to meet & hug every single one of you,” Afualo said in an Instagram post announcing the tour.

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Loud: Accept Nothing Less Than the Life You Deserve is her first book and is set to drop on July 30, the day her tour starts in NYC.

Afualo’s comedy tour is just the latest effort in the digital media creator’s “agenda,” saying on Instagram, “I promised yall a hot girl summer fueled by terrorizing awful men with this book, and this tour is gonna help push that agenda. IKDFR LMFAOOOOO SEE YALL THERE!!!”

The Loud Tour Dates

• July 30 — New York, NY • July 31 — Boston, MA • August 1 — Philadelphia, PA • August 2 — Washington D.C. • August 3 — Columbus, OH • August 4 — Chicago, IL • August 6 — Nashville, TN • August 7 — Atlanta, GA • August 8 — Orlando, FL • August 9 — Ft. Lauderdale, FL • August 10 — Clearwater, FL • August 13 — Houston, TX • August 14 — Austin, TX • August 15 — Dallas, TX • August 17 — Denver, CO • August 18 — Salt Lake City, UT • August 20 — Seattle, WA • August 21 — Portland, OR • August 23 — San Jose, CA • August 24 — Los Angeles, CA • August 25 — Phoenix, AZ

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Moscow Metro Tour

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Description

Moscow metro private tours.

• 2-hour tour $87:  10 Must-See Moscow Metro stations with hotel pick-up and drop-off
• 3-hour tour $137:  20 Must-See Moscow Metro stations with Russian lunch in beautifully-decorated Metro Diner + hotel pick-up and drop off. 
• Metro pass is included in the price of both tours.

Highlight of Metro Tour

• Visit 10 must-see stations of Moscow metro on 2-hr tour and 20 Metro stations on 3-hr tour, including grand Komsomolskaya station with its distinctive Baroque décor, aristocratic Mayakovskaya station with Soviet mosaics, legendary Revolution Square station with 72 bronze sculptures and more!
• Explore Museum of Moscow Metro and learn a ton of technical and historical facts;
• Listen to the secrets about the Metro-2, a secret line supposedly used by the government and KGB;
• Experience a selection of most striking features of Moscow Metro hidden from most tourists and even locals;
• Discover the underground treasure of Russian Soviet past – from mosaics to bronzes, paintings, marble arches, stained glass and even paleontological elements;
• Learn fun stories and myths about Coffee Ring, Zodiac signs of Moscow Metro and more;
• Admire Soviet-era architecture of pre- and post- World War II perious;
• Enjoy panoramic views of Sparrow Hills from Luzhniki Metro Bridge – MetroMost, the only station of Moscow Metro located over water and the highest station above ground level;
• If lucky, catch a unique «Aquarelle Train» – a wheeled picture gallery, brightly painted with images of peony, chrysanthemums, daisies, sunflowers and each car unit is unique;
• Become an expert at navigating the legendary Moscow Metro system;
• Have fun time with a very friendly local;
• + Atmospheric Metro lunch in Moscow’s the only Metro Diner (included in a 3-hr tour)

Hotel Pick-up

Metro stations:.

Komsomolskaya

Novoslobodskaya

Prospekt Mira

Belorusskaya

Mayakovskaya

Novokuznetskaya

Revolution Square

Sparrow Hills

+ for 3-hour tour

Victory Park

Slavic Boulevard

Vystavochnaya

Dostoevskaya

Elektrozavodskaya

Partizanskaya

Museum of Moscow Metro

• Drop-off  at your hotel, Novodevichy Convent, Sparrow Hills or any place you wish
• + Russian lunch  in Metro Diner with artistic metro-style interior for 3-hour tour

Fun facts from our Moscow Metro Tours:

From the very first days of its existence, the Moscow Metro was the object of civil defense, used as a bomb shelter, and designed as a defense for a possible attack on the Soviet Union.

At a depth of 50 to 120 meters lies the second, the coded system of Metro-2 of Moscow subway, which is equipped with everything you need, from food storage to the nuclear button.

According to some sources, the total length of Metro-2 reaches over 150 kilometers.

The Museum was opened on Sportivnaya metro station on November 6, 1967. It features the most interesting models of trains and stations.

Coffee Ring

The first scheme of Moscow Metro looked like a bunch of separate lines. Listen to a myth about Joseph Stalin and the main brown line of Moscow Metro.

Zodiac Metro

According to some astrologers, each of the 12 stops of the Moscow Ring Line corresponds to a particular sign of the zodiac and divides the city into astrological sector.

Astrologers believe that being in a particular zadiac sector of Moscow for a long time, you attract certain energy and events into your life.

Paleontological finds 

Red marble walls of some of the Metro stations hide in themselves petrified inhabitants of ancient seas. Try and find some!

• Every day each car in  Moscow metro passes  more than 600 km, which is the distance from Moscow to St. Petersburg.
• Moscow subway system is the  5th in the intensity  of use (after the subways of Beijing, Tokyo, Seoul and Shanghai).
• The interval in the movement of trains in rush hour is  90 seconds .

What you get:

• + A friend in Moscow.
• + Private & customized Moscow tour.
• + An exciting pastime, not just boring history lessons.
• + An authentic experience of local life.
• + Flexibility during the walking tour: changes can be made at any time to suit individual preferences.
• + Amazing deals for breakfast, lunch, and dinner in the very best cafes & restaurants. Discounts on weekdays (Mon-Fri).
• + A photo session amongst spectacular Moscow scenery that can be treasured for a lifetime.
• + Good value for souvenirs, taxis, and hotels.
• + Expert advice on what to do, where to go, and how to make the most of your time in Moscow.

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‘French Dispatch’s’ Lyna Khoudri, ‘Deerskin’s’ Rio Vega Lead French Voice Cast of ‘In Waves’ From Silex, Anonymous Content, Charades (EXCLUSIVE)

By John Hopewell

John Hopewell

Chief International Correspondent

• ‘French Dispatch’s’ Lyna Khoudri, ‘Deerskin’s’ Rio Vega Lead French Voice Cast of ‘In Waves’ From Silex, Anonymous Content, Charades (EXCLUSIVE) 2 hours ago
• Hollywood Legend Phil Tippett, RKSS’ Anouk Whissell Bring Brand New Projects to Powerful, Rangy Cannes Frontières Selection (EXCLUSIVE)  4 days ago
• Modern Heroes Tread the World Stage From Srebrenica to Tbilisi, India, Palermo and a Wondrous Greenland Ice Sheet in Latest Swiss Docs   6 days ago

Two of France’s fastest-rising young stars, Lyna Khoudri ( “Papicha,” “The French Dispatch”) and Rio Vega ( “Deerskin,” “Sorry Angel”), will lead the French voice cast of animated feature “In Waves,” an unconditional first love story, and tale of loss and memories adapting American illustrator AJ Dungo’s same-titled multi-prized graphic novel.   

Popular on Variety

A student activist in Wes Anderson’s 2021 Cannes Palme d’Or contender “The French Dispatch,” in 2020 Khoudri scored a most promising actress Cesar Award for her performance in Mounia Meddour’s “Papicha,” having won a best actress plaudit at 2017’s Venice Horizons for “Blessed.” 

Vega’s credits take in both Quentin Dupieux’s  “Deerskin” and Christophe Honoré’s “Sorry Angel.” 

They will be joined by Paul Kircher who earned nominations for a most promising actor César Award for his starring roles in both 2022’s “Winter Boy” and last year’s “The Animal Kingdom,” and by Birana Ba, a member of the Comédie Française, star of Jeanne Henry’s “Je verrai toujours vos visages” and a co-star in “Transatlantic.”

Rio will voice the shy Los Angeles high-school student AJ, who falls heed-over-heels for Kristen (Khoudri) who is described as radiant, beautiful and popular. 

As Kirsten introduces AJ to surfing, their love blooms, surrounded by their close-knit community, despite Kristen’s increasingly severe illness. “AJ is there for her as she battles the illness with dignity, never abandoning her ‘joie de vivre,’ until the very end,” a plot description runs. Kircher plays Eon, AJ’s cousin, and Ba Francisco, AJ’s friend. 

“In Waves” is a true “Love Story’ with surfing and skating as a backstory. It’s an ambitious animated feature, made in a mix of 2D and 3D with a realistic 2D rendering, for a wide 13+ audience, young adults and adults,” she added.  

“Its themes of first love, loss, and memory will speak to worldwide audiences across age ranges and demographics and is a needed anecdote to help inject positive emotion back into our everyday,” said Anonymous Content’s Nick Shumaker, when  Variety  announced that the company had boarded “In Waves.”

“In Waves” is also co-produced by France 3 Cinéma and Belgium’s Panique! It is written by Fanny Burdino and Samuel Doux, screenwriters of movies by Joachim Lafosse (“After Love”) and Laurent Cantet (“Arthur Rambo”) and Warner Bros. Discovery’s soon-to-release first French original miniseries, “The Mythomaniac Of The Bataclan,” directed by Just Philippot.

The soundtrack is composed by Robin Coudert (“ROB”), behind the score of “The Bureau,” and by singer and composer Marylou Mayniel (“Oklou”). 

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Europe Tour Recap

We are back from Europe– it was a great time as always, although it got slightly hairy a few days in. I posted a handful of quick things on Facebook while we were over there; they are collected here for your reading pleasure. – Nate

April 23 Our first show ever in Italy ruled. Really fun time. I slipped on a lemon peel after the show (really) and totally messed up my knee, so that’s lame. Definitely the worst thing a lemon has ever done to me; usually I like them. But besides that, it’s been awesome here! Had some excellent Pizza and beers next to a lake, and then checked out a castle. Two more shows here, and then on to Slovenia

April 25 Man, Italy was so much fun. Had another great show last night. Such a friendly, enthusiastic crowd. Hung out on the patio until 3am drinking beers and discussing metal records, and I realized the “duh-nuh-nuh-nuh, nuh-nuh-nuh” system of expressing metal riffage is truly universal and transcends language. We were also trying to recall Megadeth lyrics and I only came up with one, “You take a mortal man / and put him in control” (followed by the aforementioned duh nuh nuns) How many can you remember, top of your head, no cheating? The Megadeth Lyric Challenge. Maybe it’s easy and I’m simply not a metalhead. Anyway: Great times! Slovenia is up next – Nate

April 27 Thanks, Budapest! Another great show in another beautiful city. Special shout out to our new friend who drove all the way from Serbia to see us. Walked around for 5+ hours today and it was great. And at the end of the walk, I was able to eat my first taco since leaving home. It wasn’t a bad taco, either. Day off today. Going to check out Off With Their Heads in Vienna. See you there? After that, three shows in Germany. Looking forward to it.

And THEN — after being stuck in standstill traffic for a couple hours — the van started making weird noises, died, and suddenly we’re stranded on the side of the damn autobahn! Sun’s going down, cold out, and there are cars zipping by inches from the van at 100+ miles an hour.

Kind of crazy day! But then we called a tow truck, got towed to a mechanic, got picked up by OWTH, got to the venue and played possibly the best show of the tour. Thanks, Nurnberg! Now we’re hanging out waiting to hear from the mechanic. Hope we can make the show tonight, wish us luck! Oh yeah, also breakfast in Vienna was really good yesterday. So that was cool. First guacamole of the tour, nice

April 29 Part Two Update: the van will not be fixed today. Secured a one-day van rental here in Nurnberg. While we picked it up, the other guys started bringing all our stuff down from the apartment we were staying at to the street. Idea being, we’ll pull up and take off right away for Weisbaden. We show up, and find out that somehow the door closed behind them while taking a load downstairs. The guy’s only key is locked inside. So now we are driving to his grandparents’ house to get the spare key. 40 minutes round trip.

Once we get the key, and get back to his apartment, and get the rest of the stuff, and get on the road, and get to Wiesbaden, and then get back to Nurnberg after the show, and then (hopefully) get our own van fixed tomorrow morning, we will be back on track!

April 30 So, two days later and the mechanic still has not fixed the van. Stranded in Nurnberg again. Looking like we are going to have to rent two mini vans to get to Uncle M Fest tonight, and the hopefully Groezrock from there. I don’t suppose anyone is sitting on an awesome solution here? Like, you live in Nurnberg and have a new touring van you were hoping to break in? You’re the inventor of a tour-by-helicopter system and would like to test it on someone? Let us know!

May 1st In a 48 hour stretch we had three rental vans, one tow truck ride, three cab rides, three shows that we barely got to, one near fist fight on the highway with some angry truckers, one hour on the side of the autobahn, one stranded box of vinyl records, six or so hours of standstill traffic, one van engine that turns out to be completely destroyed, one key accidentally locked in an apartment, one half-drunk late night conversation about 1970s snare sounds versus 1980s snare sounds, one viewing of Terminator 2, and so much more.

And after all that….. we’re on the road about one hour from Groezrock. Boom. Let’s party!! We play tomorrow but will also be selling merch today. Stop by!

May 4th Man, Groezrock was so much fun. Had a great show and it was a blast checking out other bands and just wandering around running into people. Never really checked out Refused before, to be honest, but watching them from onstage was pretty unreal. Special shout out to Kate and Alexander for bringing us our missing box of vinyl all the way from outside Nurnberg. Totally saved us.

Eindhoven was also great, despite the fact that all of us felt like we had been awake for 11 years in a row. Nick, the promoter, was an excellent host– showed us around Rotterdam and schooled me in FIFA on XBox 6-0. I was pretty proud of myself for keeping him to single digits.

Now we’re in Paris for the final show of the tour. Despite all the van chaos in the middle, this has been a really really fun tour. Lots of fun shows and great sights and incredibly friendly people.

Oh, also we just paid a parking meter a little bit ago and couldn’t tell if the printed receipt was saying it was successful, or that the transaction failed. So I tried to speak the French into Google Translate and it returned, “It brings ancient beasts. Fear watch is kept on the bird.” Ruh-oh. I pictured placing it on our dash and having a parking attendant start screaming, “N-no! NO! You don’t realize what you have done!” So anyway, apologies if we just unleashed the apocalypse but stoked for the show tonight!

Europe 2012 Part 2

Here is installment #2 of a multi-part blog/diary of our 2012 European tour. This covers day three. – Nate

Day Three: First Show, Green Shots

There are many differences between traveling and touring, but the biggest one for me is how you experience a city. When you’re traveling, the entire purpose of being where you are is to go check things out, and that’s what you do: you wake up early and walk around, wandering through different neighborhoods, popping into cafes or restaurants or bars, peering or at least glancing at local architecture, seeking out anything unique the city has to offer.

When you’re touring, though, more often than not you wake up late and spend a sizable portion of your day in a van, occasionally trudging outside (perhaps observing, “Ah, my legs hurt!” as you take the first few zombie-like steps) and into a gas station to use the bathroom and get an energy bar or something, but for the most part you’re in that van and then around 4 or 5pm you get to the club you’re playing at, where you load equipment in, sound check, set-up merch, figure out what to do for dinner, and now holy crap it’s 7pm and the bands are already starting. At this point, maybe you’ll walk ten blocks around the club and back, but that’s about it–sometimes, you just stay at the club and you don’t go anywhere. You can fool yourself and think, after a six minute walk from the club and back, “Cool, I got to check out Sacramento. It has streets, and also buildings, neat,” but compared to traveling, you really don’t get to soak in cities the same way when you’re on tour.

I want to be very clear here: I’m not complaining. I’m just pointing out the differences. There are clear positives to touring too. When you’re traveling, you don’t get to play music for people every night, and you probably don’t get to meet as many strangers. When you’re playing a show, there is definitely a sense of, “Every person in this building has something in common”, and that can lead to great interactions. That doesn’t happen as often when you’re traveling, unless you’re like, “Whoa. Every person in this room has something in common. We all felt like eating vietnamese food right now.” (And then you stand up, go interrupt a couple eating and ask them, “So when did you guys get into Pho?”)

To sum up this long-winded rant in a more efficient way than the previous three paragraphs: touring and traveling are both great; they just have their own advantages and disadvantages and general differences. And usually, one of those differences is that you don’t experience a city as deeply when you’re on tour.

But: not always! The main reason it happens that way is the whole spending-hours-driving-from-city-to-city-every-day deal, but every now and then you wake up and you’re already in the city you’re playing in, so you can spend the day doing whatever you want, basically the same as if you were a traveler/tourist.

On paper, that was the case in Monchengladbach. Weeks earlier, we had realized this. “We’ll be waking up earlier, because we’ll be taking it easy and going to bed early on purpose the night before. We can take a train into Dusseldorf, walk around for a few hours, and then head back for the show. Sweet.”

When I opened my eyes at 3:30pm and saw that no one else was up yet, I realized we would not be taking any trains to Dusseldorf. Oh well. Next time.

I got up and I felt reasonably good, I guess, but in a bizarre way I had no idea what time it felt like. I knew what time it was , and I knew it didn’t feel right, but that was about it. It certainly didn’t feel like 4pm, but it also didn’t feel like 9am, which is what my body was supposedly still used to. It was some weird time that didn’t make any sense. F PM, or something. This was a bit discombobulating. Maybe food would help.

Marius set out a nice, simple breakfast and we dug in. I felt a little better. As we ate, someone called and informed us that Joe’s wallet had been found, and it would be at the club, and also that his mom said Hi. This was all good news.

—–

We headed to the club, which was about 3 minutes away. Nice; none of us felt like walking too much further than that. We set up merch and then Heike, our driver for the tour, showed up with the van and all our equipment. (A few people asked me this when we got back: did you guys drive yourselves? Did you bring all your amps with you? No and no; we hired a driver and rented equipment. Both things were super awesome! It would have been absurdly sucky to fly with a bunch of amps; I can’t even imagine trying to negotiate that with a Delta employee or whatever; “Trust me, this cabinet will fit in the overhead bin, just let me on!” And Heike was an excellent driver, but more importantly she was just super rad and fun to hang out with. Hopefully I didn’t spoil too much by telling you all of this. I guess maybe it would have been cooler and more suspenseful to reveal that Heike is super rad later in the blog, but too late now.)

The equipment all appeared to be good. Last time we toured Europe I had a monstrous 8×10 bass cabinet inside a heavy, awkward case and it was kind of a drag to haul out every show. This time, I had requested to NOT get that again, and now had, instead, a much smaller and nicer bass amp that would still be able to keep up with the guitar amps. This was a relief to see.

“Well, not really. That’s sort of a banana seat.”

Can’t win them all, I suppose. I just tried to find a picture of a banana seat, and found this description of “thrones” from the website Modern Drummer: “The throne is the foundation of any player’s groove.” Throne, Player, and Groove, all in one sentence! I love it.

After some excellent vegetarian chili and bread, we set up, sound checked, and people started spilling in. A lot of people from the bar the night before showed up. Almost all of them, on both nights, kept telling us this would be our best show of the entire tour. “So and so was here last month, and they said the same thing: Monchengladbach was their best show, by far. Nothing else compared.” On one hand, this was exciting; the show was apparently going to be very good– I like things that are very good! But it was also like hearing, “It’s all going to be downhill after this, guys!”

The show itself WAS great. We were definitely shaking off a little rust, but it wasn’t too bad and the crowd seemed into it. This helped to offset any first-show-sloppiness; if people are dancing and singing along and having fun (as opposed to staring at you with stony eyes and crossed arms), it’s a better vibe and a bit of looseness isn’t that big of a deal. We had a great time. Would it be the best show of the entire tour? That remained to be seen (no spoilers, don’t worry).

After the show people started feeding us green shots. They weren’t great, but they weren’t bad, and they seemed to be relatively efficient. They were a local speciality, apparently. I think they were called “Flim”. In other cities in Germany, I would ask people if they had these shots, but I always said it wrong, like “Flem”. Essentially, I’d end up asking a complete stranger at a bar, “So, do you guys do shots of phlegm here? No? Phlegm? We did them in this other city in Germany, and they were pretty good. Shots of phlegm. All green and stuff. No?”, oblivious to the blend of befuddlement/disgust/horror seeping into their faces.

——–

After a couple rounds of flim/phlegm/whatever, we went back to Marius’s place where, among other things:

1. We passed around a few acoustic guitars and played songs. I played an MDC song, very poorly.

2. We, for some reason, ordered 7 pizzas even though only 4 or 5 people wanted any. It wasn’t terrible pizza or anything but afterwards I vowed to eat no more pizza for the rest of the tour, a pledge I’m happy to say I kept. It’s just too hard to tell if you’re getting crappy pizza ahead of time, you know?

3. We had a generally fun time hanging out listening to music, playing the aforementioned guitars, eating the aforementioned pizza, and went to bed extremely late again. Monchengladbach, a city I had never even heard of two weeks earlier, and proven itself to be one of the funnest spots in Europe we had been to thus far on either tour.

Next up: an outdoor festival in Germany!

Europe 2012 Part 1

Here is installment #1 of a multi-part blog/diary of our 2012 European tour. This covers days one and two. – Nate

Day One: Volcano-Free Flying 

The flight itself was uneventful. Earlier in the week I had read an article about jet lag that said wearing sunglasses the night you leave — at the airport and on the plane — and through the day you arrive, helped to diminish the effects. I wasn’t sure if this theory had any merit or if it bore a closer resemblance to sketchy internet pop-up ads (‘Doctors HATE him… learn his weight loss secret’), but jet lag can suck and I figured it couldn’t hurt to try. The downside was that wearing shades indoors at night probably made me look like a bit of a prick, but the upside was that it was easier to pass out. I got weird, scattered sleep (twenty minutes here, five there, totaling to a couple hours), but it was better than zero sleep. Along with it came bizarre dreams: I was in the Triple Rock with Joe (our roadie for the tour) and he pointed up at a chalkboard and said, “Dude, Brorrosion of Conformity is playing soon, it’s going to rule. It’s bros playing Corrosion of Conformity covers.” Brilliant idea. Someone should do that, stat.

Knowing that we would be at least somewhat jet lagged, we had wisely set up the tour so we did NOT have a show on the first day. On the 2010 tour, this worked great. We got to Paris, had dinner, Nick and Corey crashed, Danny and I walked around to a few bars, and all of us were asleep by 11pm, refreshed and ready to start playing shows the next day. It didn’t quite work out that way in Germany. Our host, Marius (we would learn later his friends call him Warius after a certain level of drinking gets met; I never really saw this, but it’s a great nickname. Go look up the Wario wiki page if you don’t get it) got us at the airport and brought us directly to a liquor store. If you are a fan of beer, and are a giddy person, this was the kind of building that would cause you to run around, occasionally leaping into the air and clicking your heels. Like so:

I’m not much of a beer drinker, but I could appreciate the options stacked up around us. So many! So unique, compared to America at least! All of us picked an assortment of beers more or less randomly, based on how cool the bottle looked and how badass the name sounded. “This is called KrakenBasher and looks like like the kind of beer an old-timey king would drink!”; that sort of thing. Outside, Marius appraised our choices. Some were good, others caused him to grin and shake his head: “That’s shitty.” I realized this whole scene was probably similar to bringing a European to Minneapolis and watching them emerge from a liquor store asking, “Is this good? This is good, right?” as they hold up a 12 pack of Natural Ice. The difference between America and Germany, though, was that here in Germany we were able to hang out and drink in the liquor store parking lot and no one shooed us away or tried to handcuff us or what not. We were politely enjoying a couple beers, and it wasn’t a big deal; society wasn’t shattering around us. Why can’t we do this in America? (I don’t mean, like, “God, it is SO hard not to crack open a beer immediately upon purchasing it, this is so unfair, blah blah”, I just mean that it doesn’t seem like allowing it harms anything). I suppose, though, that the reason is because no sane politician is going to assume this issue as a rallying cry. Can you picture some guy in a suit climbing on top of a soapbox and yelling to a crowd, “The path ahead is not short, it is not smooth, and it is not easy, but it will be lit by the fires of our desire to come together and accomplish what we have dreamed of for so long: the ability to drink beer in parking lots!”? Not so much.

After one beer, which truly did feel like two, we headed to Marius’s house in Monchangladbach (where the show would be the next day). We had some truly awesome homemade lasagna and then, resisting the temptation to take it easy and go to bed early as we did in 2010, went across the street to his friends’ apartment. There were a bunch of people hanging out, including some kids from America who were in the army and stationed in Germany. We had a few drinks and talked while the Lawrence Arms DVD played in the background and then we made our way to a local bar. German beer can be — what’s the word? — strong, and even stronger when you haven’t been sleeping (see the flawed equation above), a situation which lead to Joe having what looked remarkably like a beer stain tie within an hour of arriving at the bar, and losing his wallet on the first night of tour. (He got it back the next day, luckily, but it still had to be weird for his mom, who got a call from the person who found it…. your kid goes to Europe and about twenty hours later you’re getting calls from German strangers who have his wallet!)

Left my bass strap in the states. In Northern France I had to make the following choice. I have no regrets.

The Sexy, Stylish Rental Car We Took Home

Originally Posted November 2009 on Tumblr

Transmissions From the Show Me State

Last day of the tour was in St. Louis. A bit of a hike from Dallas, so we left early and tried to keep the stops to a minimum. We finally pulled off in Springfield Missouri for gas and grub, and as we did so the van began making weird noises and chugging along, having difficulty going faster than about 30. It also ceased being able to go in reverse, meaning we had to be verrrry strategic about our parking.

Given all of this, we knew the problem was the transmission. Hopefully it was just the same problem as earlier in the tour, when the van was just a little low on transmission fluid and adding some fixed the rattling/chugging problem we were running into on the highway.

But this seemed a little more serious, and alas it was. The mechanic stuck a dipstick in my face. “Smell this,” he said.

“Well?” he asked.

“Uh, well I guess it doesn’t smell good or anything…”

“It’s burnt. Burnt transmission fluid. You’ve got a problem with the transmission. Sorry, but we can’t do anything for you here.”

All of the transmission places in town were closed until Monday. Presumably, it would be an expensive repair. So, we decided to ditch the van at a transmission shop (leaving a note for them) and rent our way out of town. The car rental places at the airport had one — one! — vehicle between the five of them that would be able to go one-way to Minneapolis. So we had to take that AND a U-Haul for the gear. Bummer. At least we got to enjoy the CD player for a full 22 hours!

However, we were lucky in one sense— had we chosen to take some random, small exit rather than the one for Springfield, there’s no way we would have found a car shop, a U-haul, or a car rental place, and would have almost certainly been stuck in some small town for days.

We hauled ass, still made it the show — which despite being pretty zonked from a full day on the road plus all the van crap ended up being pretty fun.

We drove straight home at 2am when the show got done, stopping for 3 hours of sleep at a rest stop. Except for having to ditch the van, it was an all-around blast of a tour!

After Prairieville we had three shows in Texas with Dead to Me, all of which were great. Those dudes are all super nice and fun to hang out with, and put on a great show. It was kind of a bummer we only got to play a total of five shows with them.

A brief rundown:

San Antonio : This was the semi-weird one out of the Texas shows. Located in a strip mall, the venue had recently opened and was clearly catering to the metal scene. Called Zombies, a blood-and-guts theme dominated the painting in the various rooms, every single ‘upcoming show’ on the calendar was a metal show (I’m assuming; maybe Cannibal Slaughter is a folk band, who knows) and the majority of the songs on the jukebox featured the use of double kick drum pedals.

Not a huge deal; the staff was friendly and the handful of kids hanging out seem stoked for the show. But there was one problem: the place was huge! Like, absurdly huge! It reminded me not of any venues I’ve played at before, but of a used video game warehouse I used to work at in high school. Just insanely big.

It would certainly have a weird vibe to play for 20 people in a room that could plausibly fit 1500, especially from a large stage that was about five feet off the ground. But then Chicken had a genius idea: have the entire crowd come on stage with us! This instantly made it feel like we were playing in a packed, tiny basement that had been plopped down in the middle of an empty meatpacking warehouse. And basement-inside-of-an-empty-meatpacking-warehouse shows are some of the best.

Austin : Only an hour drive to Austin! Up to that point the tour had had surprisingly long drives, so this was a welcome change. We got stuff done with all this extra time: burritos for breakfast, car wash, laundry, and the installation of a new CD player with a line-in for iPods! This was far superior to the 1991-era tape deck we had been using up to that point. One of my favorite things to do in a van on tour is listen to the comp CDs people give you at shows, grade each song as you go, and then chuck it out the window when you’re done if it’s bad (which, usually, it is!) Previously Banner Pilot has been unable to do this, but now we’ve catapulted our way into modern times with this acquisition of CD player technology!

The show was at this cool club called Red 7 where the stage is located back in an outdoor patio area. Super fun show. Dead to Me were great and had a couple of the guys from Riverboat Gamblers join them for the last two songs.

Dallas : I have to admit, I didn’t think Dallas would be a very good show (at least three people in Austin, when I asked them what Dallas was like, responded with some variation of “It sucks!” The guy who installed our CD player thought for a second and said, “Well, there’s a lot of murders there.” Ringing endorsements!). But, it ended up actually being pretty awesome— more people than I would have guessed, enthusiastic crowd (that sounds cheezy but i don’t know how else to put it), pretty good openers. Sweet.

All in all, I had a blast in Texas.

So Long, Tape Deck

We will miss your DNR feature. And the Auto Reverse was awesome. Sniff…

We Sound Kind of Like Nirvana

We had a day off after Fest (extremely smart idea on our part!) which we spent in New Orleans (another smart idea!) After that we met up with Dead to Me in a small town called Prairieville, outside of Baton Rouge.

We arrived early at the bar, the Fat Cat Saloon. The waitress asked what kind of music we played. This task — describing your music to someone who doesn’t listen to punk music — can be difficult. If I say something like “Tiltwheel crossed with Dillinger Four and a dash of Screeching Weasel”, their reaction will probably be “Guh?” And with good reason— it’d be like if I asked a hippie what his band sounds like, and he says “Well, we take a bit from Seesaw Orb, a little bit from The Mustard Bottle Project, and then also the improvisational freedom of Harvest Skiddle”…. I would look at him like he’s a lunatic who should be chained up somewhere. It would be much better if he just said “Phish. We sound sort of like Phish.” Then I could say, “Oh. That’s cool, man.”

When we get asked this question, I usually opt for Green Day. Just about everyone knows what Green Day sounds like, and we’re at least ballpark-similar to them. Usually a safe, good, go-to answer.

The waitress stared back at us blankly.

“It’s punk rock stuff,” I added. I usually avoid this answer because it can invite imagery of everything from Sex Pistols to Good Charlotte, depending on who you’re talking to. Way too vague. But since she didn’t know Green Day, a broader description seemed to be called for.

“So, metal? You guys play super loud?”

Nick shook his head. “It’s not metal. It… it is loud. You might want to wear earplugs. But it’s not like metal really. We sound….” he seemed to be searching for a cultural reference point “… we sound kind of like… Nirvana?”

She shrugged. “Never heard of them. I just listen to country and Creed.”

I opened my mouth and considered saying “We’re kind of like Creed, I guess, in a very broad sense,” but then wisely re-closed my mouth, horrified at the implications of acknowledging something like that.

“I guess you’ll just have to check it out and see what you think.”

She shrugged again. “Oh, I don’t care. My shift is done at 7 so I won’t be here anyway.” she walked away to get a beer for someone.

The only other people in the bar, which was full of semi-cryptic anti-Obama art, were four or five burly men who did not look like they would be familiar with Green Day or Nirvana either, let alone Screeching Weasel. It had all the makings for a ridiculous/hilarious show, but by the time Dead to Me showed up the place had filled up a bit with people who were there for the show.

It ended up being really fun. For some reason I really like playing in small bars. More so than the average ‘club.’ Between bands you can hang out and talk or play foosball or something instead of having to yell over loud between-band music. Plus Coronas were only $2, the cheapest I found all tour.

Dead to Me were great, too. It was only the second show we had played with them (the warehouse show being the first), but I was already recognizing (and liking) some of the new songs.

Still pretty wiped from New Orleans the night before, we went to a motel after the show and got some rest.

Fest! Fest! Fest!

Egads, there’s a whole 10 days of tour that I was too lazy to write about while we were on the road. Better do it now before I forget about it. After I catch up, I’ll start using this blog to write about the process of writing songs for the next album. This might prove to be rather inane, but we’ll see!

Anyway: the tour. Last update was about Richmond and their tiny-style bowling alleys. After that we had a day off (spent mostly driving and briefly hanging out in the always-fun Savannah), and then we made it to Tampa for the annual pre-Fest show.

We missed this last year but played in 06 and 07, and it was good to be back. Always a blast hanging out in the parking lot with people, and it’s a good way to catch bands that you know you’ll miss over the actual Fest for whatever reason.

While we were hanging around outside some kid tried to jump from the top of one van to the top of another van, didn’t make it and fell hard to the ground. Pretty messed up. Ambulances came and took him away. I never found out what happened to him, but hopefully he was ok and just ended up with minor bruises and what not.

Besides that, it was a good time. The rest of the weekend was spent in Gainesville, of course, for The Fest. Always one of my highlights of the year, and this time was no exception (unless the remaining 6 weeks of 2009 prove to be so awesome that Fest feels so-so in comparison. But I have a feeling that will not happen). This year I caught a lot of great sets: Cheeky, Bad Friends, A Wilhelm Scream, Stoned at Heart, Smalltown, Jonesin’, Too Many Daves, D4, Dear Landlord, Copyrights, The Measure, Good Luck, Panthro UK United 13, Broadway Calls, OWTH, The Arrivals, Tiltwheel, etc etc. Sweet.

As for us, we had a cool mix of shows: 2:30pm Saturday, where people seemed to be into it but were mostly sober or hungover, and then that night at 2:30am in a warehouse, where it appeared that everyone had been tied up to a grain alcohol IV all day, and went nuts. That warehouse show was maybe the best show of the whole tour, actually. We played Skeleton Key live for the first time ever, figuring that if we screwed it up everyone would be too drunk to notice. But it turned out ok! I think!

All in all, a great time

Duckpin Bowling

Fest ended yesterday— a blast as always. Somewhere in Alabama right now; seems like a good time to update the olde tour blog. Or is that ye olde tour blog?

Last Tuesday we played Richmond at a Duckpin Bowling Alley, where all the balls and pins are tiny. The place appeared to have last been updated in the 1950s and had been designed with a vaguely ‘futuristic’ theme in mind. This was somewhat jarring: a building from the 50s, designed as what the owners pictured the 80s being like, experienced in the 2000s, while music from the early 90s (Salt n Pepa! C&C Music Factory!) played in the background. This was a little like walking into a cafe and seeing a bunch of beatniks dancing to disco music while wearing civil war uniforms.

Luckily the show was ok. We wanted to try the bowling but it was $16 an hour. No thanks!

Boston, Not the Band. And Albany

Originally Posted October 2009 on Tumblr

When booking this tour I remember thinking that the short drives would be nice. After all, west coast = long drives, east coast = short drives. I mean, that’s a simplification and it depends on the specifics, but generally I’ve thought it to be true.

Not anymore! All the east coast drives took way longer than expected and Philly to Boston was no exception. By the time we got into town we only had time to eat and then headed to the show. Oh well. Right now I’m in a van heading towards Tampa and the next four days will feature a total of two hours of driving. So that should be cool.

ANYway, I sound like a whiny grandmother talking about this, so I’ll stop now. Boston ended up being a great show. The sound was great and the Cobra Skulls and TBR ruled as always.

The following morning we headed back into Manhattan for a tour of Howard Stern’s studio that we had set up. It was short but pretty interesting. From there it was up to Albany to play at a punk bar called Valentines. Fun show with the exception of this guy who adhered to the “slam your body violently into people and knock things over!!” school of show etiquette. After nearly knocking over the mixing board he was lead outside, where he yelled, “People don’t know how to fucking DANCE anymore!!”

Oh yeah, also: Albany has this weird ‘Block of the Year’ thing. We saw two totally non-descript blocks that were the 1997 and 1998 Blocks of the Year. Just thought i’d share that factoid with you.

All About the Benjamins

Ok, back to catching up. Where were we? Oh yeah, Philadelphia. Last Saturday. Let’s see….

It was rainy when we rolled into town so we limited the touristy stuff we had planned. Pretty much just saw the Liberty Bell, which I already saw when I was on tour with Rivethead years ago so I’m not sure why I went back. It’s still a bell.

Some fairly interesting history though. Did you know that the big crack is the result of an attempt at fixing a tiny crack? Can you imagine how that poor bell repairman must have felt? “Hey guys? Can you come in here for a second? I, uh….”

Also, some dude rang the bell during a tour a few years back. He went to jail for one year. If I had to pick one trial to be a jury member of, that might be the one.

On the way back to the van we also walked by Ben Franklin’s grave (as well as Benny’s, a restaurant named after Ben Franklin). People throw pennies at his grave; there were tons of them when we showed up. I found this somewhat hilarious because his famous saying was “a penny saved is a penny earned”, meaning that all these people are mocking him by chucking coins on his grave.

As for the show, it ended up being a lot of fun. Probably 50 times better than our last Philly show. It was at some house called the TerrorDome—- decent turnout, friendly people, good opening bands. All around, a good time.

Finding beer sucked though. It took us 45 minutes in a torrential downpour to find a case of beer. Some bar offered to sell us a six pack for $16. Absurd! Maybe Ben Franklin has cursed the city due to their penny-mocking

A Cautionary Cheetos Tale

Nate: You’re eating Jalepeno Cheddar Cheetos for breakfast?

Danny: Yeah. There wasn’t much else in the store

Danny: It feels like there’s little metal shavings poking my stomach

Where to Get Pizza in Brooklyn

So in Endicott two different people assured me parking in Manhattan is simple. This turned out to be… Not Even Remotely Accurate. Maybe they were thinking about the Grand Theft Auto version of Manhattan. We gave it a shot but it was ridiculous so the other dudes dropped me off and went to Brooklyn.

I met up with Vanessa, Ray from Teenage Bottlerocket, and Joey Cape to do a radio thingie for Marky Ramone’s show on Sirius/XM. It wasn’t quite what I expected but it was neat and pretty fun. I think it airs a week from tomorrow so check it out if you have satellite radio.

After that we headed back to Brooklyn for the show. The sound was pretty weird but I think we played ok. Cobra Skulls were fun; never seen them before. And TBR were awesome despite being sick.

After the show we walked up to Lulus where Pretty Boy Thorson was playing with the Sandworms (who ruled) and Nato Cole. The bar was great and you got a free pizza for every beer you bought. That’s not a typo! An entire pizza! And the beers don’t cost, you know, $16 or whatever. You would expect such a pizza to either be tomato sauce smeared on a piece of soiled cardboard or nasty greasy slop along the lines of CiCis….. but this was actually pretty good pizza! So check out Lulus next time you’re in Brooklyn. Get the fake pepperoni on your pizza, too.

I think that’s about all we did in Brooklyn from what I remember!

Endicott Times (terrible End Times pun)

As expected, I’ve totally slacked on doing this. Dammit! I’ll do my best to remember what we’ve been up to since Thursday. I’m drinking and selling merch in a loud Albany bar so this will be brief, and possibly vaguely incoherent.

Thursday: With the 18 hour drive from Minneapolis behind us we wheeled into Endicott NY and played the basement of an abandoned used CD store. The only thing left in the store was a single, sad magazine rack with half a dozen aged offerings. I cracked up imagining this was the only thing the store sold: Time magazines from 2006 and Popular Mechanics from nine years ago. “Why aren’t we turning a profit?!” Apparently though the place was recently vacated and will soon be a recording studio. Cool.

Anyway, the show was pretty good. We were a little rusty but that was to be expected I guess. Nancy were great. They played a Slayer cover where half of the band kept trying to give up and the other half wouldn’t let them.

The bass player remained immobile the entire time, staring straight ahead. I figured that was his schtick — “I’m the stoic one” or whatever — but after the show when I complimented him he said, “Thanks. I have the swine flu. I’m seeing tunnel vision.”

Oh noes! It has begun. The Quest to Not Get The Swine Flu Tour 2009. Actually that’s a horrible tour name. Let’s call it…. The Dudes With ‘Tudes Tour. Way tougher.

So, let’s hope we don’t get sick like we did in May. Anyway, Endicott was fun but we had to get to New York early so we took off after the show and got some driving in.

Ok, in case my phone dies I’m going to post this now and do the other dates separately!

Instant Banner Pilot

Drove about 11 hours yesterday and stopped at a Super 8. The lobby was probably the worst smelling room I’ve been inside in at least six years or so. It smelled like used floss mixed with low-grade anti-bug spray. I was reluctant but it was already pretty late. Luckily the actual room smelled ok.

We stayed up and sorted merch. Danny tried to make cheddar cheese ramen using hot water from the coffee maker but it didn’t work that well and then he realized we had no utensils. After debating the merits of using a key or a sharpie pen to eat ramen with, he just drank it instead. “This is disgusting,” he said. “You guys do not want to be eating what I’m eating right now.”

While sorting the merch, we discovered a blank white t-shirt. Inspired, I used the rejected-as-a-utensil sharpie to make a Ramen noodle-themed Banner Pilot t-shirt. I can’t remember now but I think it has the little smiley face guy and says “Instant Banner Pilot: Chicken Flavored” and, unlike most shirts, advertises that it has no trans fat.

Only one in existence! If you want to buy it, ask one of us at a show and we’ll grab it from the van.

On the highway in Ohio right now; New York is next.

Hipster Worm

Man, we must have partied pretty hard the night after Portland– we camped out by the ocean and I remember we had a (loud) conversation about how the log in this picture looked like a hipster worm. As the campers nearby tried to drift off under the stars and ocean mist, they were kept up by rambling slurring along the lines of “This worm would be all like ‘I saw Husker Du in a basement.'” The next morning it just looked like a charred log. Sorry, fellow campers! We thought we were on to something.

The camping spot was neat, though— the next morning I thought there were a half a dozen people admiring our pile of beer cans, but it turned out they were checking out a huge elk a few feet from our van. It was funny because a couple days earlier in a motel we watched some elk hunting show where these two jokers crept through a field (to dramatic music in the background) and killed an elk with a crossbow, acting as if they had just pulled of a crazily difficult task. “Yeah!” they yelled as they examined the carcass. “Oh man, yeah!” Anyway, the funny thing is that this elk by our van barely moved, even as people got within a few feet of it. So what’s so impressive about shooting one? It’d be like bragging about shooting a cow.

Portland Etc

Let’s see, Portland: we played an okay show at this place called the Tonic Lounge. It went alright for a Sunday show. Hung out with some of the Drunken Boat folks and Mike and Emily from mpls, and then the next day we climbed some big hill east of Portland. As far as hills go, this one was pretty good. Yeah.

What else? I think we walked around for awhile and checked out an old school arcade called Ground Kontrol. I randomly played some weird game called Goop or Gorb or something that featured the sample from the Zoinks album ‘Bad Movie Space Cadet.’ The game was terrible! I remember reading an interview where they said the sample came from an obnoxiously loud game in their local arcade… they were right! It was crazy loud, completely drowning out the great Burgertime soundtrack next to it.

I almost bought an NES Power Pad for fourteen dollars so we could use it as a banner behind us for the remaining shows, but decided against it when I realized that was an extremely idiotic idea.

So yeah: that was Portland in a nutshell.

Unicorn Saturday in Seattle

We stayed in Seattle on Saturday and played another show at FBK for Jerome from Snuggle’s birthday party. In theory it might seem ridiculous to play the same show two days in a row, but just like the “theory” of gravity no one can say for sure. In our case, the show was great and even better than Friday’s show. First, they had set up a huge inflatable unicorn jumping thingy for the party. Apparently when the company came and set it up no one knew exactly what they had ordered and at first, as it slowly inflated in the back yard, it appeared to be a big blue house. “That’s kinda cool”, people thought, and then everyone was blown away as a horse head awkwardly pushed itself out. “A horse!” But the inflatable party company wasn’t done yet, and as the horse head filled and straightened out, a unicorn horn popped out and pointed towards the heavens as cheers tore through the yard.

Sweet. So, for this show we played in the backyard– I think it was the first time a band has ever performed inbetween an inflatable unicorn and a fire. Suck on that, Dave Matthews Band. Anyway, the fire was pretty hot, though not as hot as the basement on Friday, but it provided a nice way for me to see the dots on my bass in the darkness. Danny thought his drum throne was going to melt but it held up admirably. We also (sort of) pulled off the J Church cover we haven’t played in months. All in all a great time. Afterwards some idiot started throwing firecrackers in the house and hit me in the ear with one, which was admittedly super punk rock but still kind of a drag.

Friday in Seattle

The first show in Seattle was great– we played in the basement at the FKB house with Snuggle and Sonskull. It felt like we were playing in a sauna that was built in the middle of a volcano, but it was tons of fun and the other bands were great. Afterwards we hung out in the backyard and got a rockin fire going (see photo). I think that’s about it? I can’t remember; it was days ago and since becoming a blogger last week my attention span now tops out at fifteen minutes or thereabouts.

The van we have is called “the Gladiator”– not a goofy name we chose; that’s the actual official name the company came up with. It’s funny because once you get inside it has silly purple drapes on the windows and is clearly designed with family vacations and crap in mind. So the name was probably meant to appeal to some tough guy suburban dad… “yeah, got me a Gladiator,” he could say to his buddies as they have a beer.

“Oh yeah? Let’s take a look inside.”

“…nah, right now it’s… full of dead deer…. that I killed.”

Anyway: I assumed the marketing effort failed because I’ve never seen another one. Until now! Five minutes out of town, we’re behind another Gladiator. I wanted to pump my fist at them in solidarity but they exited too quickly.